


Ambivalence

by Perforabuntsaggittis



Category: Batman - Fandom, DCU
Genre: Angst, F/M, Resurrected Characters, Slow Burn, Time Jump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-26
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-02-06 23:41:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12828615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Perforabuntsaggittis/pseuds/Perforabuntsaggittis
Summary: Everyone gets the last words their soulmate will ever say to them seared onto their skin when they’re ten years old. Nobody thinks much of it, as it doesn’t help you find your soulmate. Until it’s too late.You, one of Bruce Wayne’s many adopted children, are running around Gotham City as Batgirl, along with Robin, otherwise known Jason Todd.••AU where soulmates have the last words they’ll ever say to each other appear somewhere on their bodies when they’re ten.





	1. Chapter 1

You were ten.

You screamed in pain as a set of words seared into your skin, blinding your vision.

When you woke up, the school nurse was staring down at you.

“How are you feeling, y/n?” You blinked.

“My head hurts.” She nodded and pointed to your arm.

“Your soul words knocked you out, sweetheart. It can be painful sometimes.” You gaped at your arm. Written on the inside of your wrist were the words _“I’m not a stupid little boy anymore!”_

Your brow furrowed as you thought of all the stupid little boys you knew. You huffed in irritation. There was no way any of them could be your soulmate.

—

You were eleven.

Your parents had died in an “unfortunate” fire that had been started by one of the neighbors. It was cruel, but it was Gotham. Crazies were everywhere.

You weren’t going to sit around and let them have at all the innocents. So you checked the newspapers, looked for where the city’s caped crusader would be. One night, you waited in an alley that was commonly used for drug deals. The Bat was bound to show up.

You heard a _whoosh_ and there he was, six feet of pure darkness and fear.

—

You were twelve.

Bruce had agreed to train you after some pestering, even adopted you, and since you’d taken up the mantle of Batgirl. You were sitting on the edge of a building, waiting.

 _Crash_.

You perked up, and rolled your eyes at the shadowy lump that was Robin. While he was a year older than you, he was still new and that made him more inexperienced.

“Smooth.” He glared at you.

“Please. Bruce told me when you started out, you could barely stand upright, princess.” Your nostrils flared at the pet name. You could practically hear him smirking.

“At least _I_ didn’t make rash decisions and mess up the job,” you shot back. He didn’t seem the least bit perturbed.

“Aw, you know you love me, doll,” He winked. You scoffed. His ego was too big for his own good.

“In your dreams.”

“Mine or yours?” You balled your hands into fists at his remark.

“You are impossible!” His smile grew wider and he just looked at you. The comms buzzed to life a second later.

 _“Batgirl and Robin, report to the batcave.”_ You turned around and swung off into the night, without waiting for him to catch up.

— 

You were thirteen.

You were propped up against the wall of the cave, while Alfred tended to your wounds. You had gone into a building full of thugs alone, and Bruce had just finished lecturing you. Jason had come down whilst Alfred finished up your stitches and left you two alone.

Jason sat across from you with his arms crossed and a blank expression on his face. You glared at him.

“What do you want?” you asked. He looked up at you, and narrowed his eyes.

“Nothing.” Your brows furrowed. There was no reason for him to sulk down here with you, he did it just the same whether you were around or not.

“Then why are you here?” He considered your facial features for a second.

“You shouldn’t have gone in there.” You snorted.

“This coming from the guy who jumps off of skyscrapers without a care in the world?” You said. “When you’re stupid and reckless everyone blows it off, but when I do it, it’s like the whole world blows up.” He narrowed his eyes at you.

“Robin’s _supposed_ to do those things. You’re Batgirl, you’re supposed to be rational.” Your jaw dropped. The _nerve_ of him.

“Are you _serious_? Because I’m Batgirl, I have to take all of the responsibility?” You were fuming. His eyes widened.

“No- that’s not-“

“Save it.” You jumped off the table and started to stomp off.

“Wait! I just-urgh!” He let out a frustrated growl. “It could’ve been worse.” You stopped in your tracks and turned around. Why would he care?

“What?” He wouldn’t look at you, but you pushed further. “Jason?” He finally glared at you.

“You just need to be more careful than that, alright?” Without another word, he stormed past you and up into the manor, leaving you standing there like a confused idiot.

 — 

You were fourteen.

You were sitting on the couch listening to Alfred talk to Jason in the next room over. It was probably rude to eavesdrop, but Bruce was making you stay at the manor because of some assassin that had it out for you, and there was nothing else to do.

“And how have your nightmares been?” Alfred asked him. You looked up. Jason wouldn't want you to hear this; he rarely opened up to people. You stood up to leave.

“They’re getting better. Last night, instead of the usual, I dreamt of my soulmate.” Your chest tightened, and you froze.

“Oh?” Alfred said. “And what were they like?”

“She.. It was a girl, and she was.. beautiful.” Your heart twinged with jealousy. “But not because of her looks. Because she was willing to fight for everything she believed in, despite what’s happened to her. Her eyes were gentle, but still fierce. Her smile had the ability to light up an entire room, but when her teeth were bared she made people cower. Her words were honey, but her threats were ice. She was like… the perfect paradox. A total badass.”

There was a pause, and then Jason cleared his throat. You suddenly blushed, realizing that you’d been standing there the whole time. They couldn’t see you, though, and you relaxed a bit.

“Sorry, Alfie. It’s probably not even real,” he muttered, clearly embarrassed at letting himself ramble.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that, Master Jason. Soulmate’s have a way with one another.” You could hear the tiny smile in Alfred’s voice.

You silently crept out of the living room before you could hear anything else.

 —

You were fifteen.

Jason was seething at you on top of one of Gotham’s many run-down buildings. You’d both just fought a couple of thugs in an alleyway. It wouldn’t have been a big deal, but he’d narrowly missed getting shot because he’d rushed straight into the line of fire, instead of taking out their guns first. You were scolding him while he paced the roof and tried to convince you he would’ve been fine.

“Robin, you can’t keep doing this. You’re going to get yourself killed.” He balled his hands into fists and glared at you.

“I had everything under control! I knew they weren’t going to hit me!” You sighed exasperatedly and ran a hand through your hair. He was so hot headed sometimes.

“No, you were lucky. I thought you were going to get shot, Robin!”

“It’s not like it hasn’t happened before! I knew the risks. You can’t keep bossing me around, y/n. I’m not going to have you to look out for me forever!” he yelled at you. There it was. The thought that made you toss and turn in your sleep at night. The thought of Jason going away and nobody to protect him from his own recklessness.

You knew he was planning on going to the Middle East to find his biological mother. You had done everything you could to prolong it, but you knew it was going to happen sooner or later.

“Jason.. please don’t go. At least, not alone,” you pleaded softly. He turned away from you, and ran a hand through his hair.

“I can do it by myself.” You growled in frustration. Why couldn’t be just _understand_?

“No, you can’t. Let me help you!” You tried to keep your voice even, but it didn’t work. You threw your hands down to your sides in frustration.

“Why do you even care?” He snapped, crossing his arms.

“Because you rush into situations instead of planning them out. You’re going to do something that’ll get you hurt, or worse!” He let out an infuriated growl at that.

“It’s always “Jason, be careful”, “Jason, don’t be reckless”, “Jason, think first”!” He threw his hands up in the air. “I’ve had this planned out for awhile, y/n. I’m leaving tonight and you can’t stop me!”

“Jason, no!” You yelled at him as he crossed the roof of the building and got out his grapple.

“Stop worrying about me so much. I’m not a stupid little boy anymore!” He shouted, then swung off into the night. Your jaw tightened with fear and worry, then your whole body froze with realization. You tried to run after him, but he was already gone.

—

You and Bruce both searched for him, but by the time you found him, it was too late. You watched as Batman carried him out of the empty warehouse, bloody and broken. You watched as his breathing slowed, and then stopped altogether. You watched as the words on your arm slowly faded into a scar.

It felt wrong to be Batgirl without Robin. So you hung up your cape and donned a new mask, a new name. You stuck to the shadows like your father, never showing your face, never letting them see you. For that, they called you Ghost.

You distanced yourself from the rest of the family. You were angry with them, and with Bruce, but most of all, with yourself.

 _How come you didn’t notice?_ You thought. You knew it was inevitably going to happen, that there was no way to stop it, but it still haunted you. That you couldn’t see he felt the same way for you after all those years. And now it was lost.

Six months later, new soul words developed below your scar. You tried everything to make them go away, from tattoos to just plain cutting them off, but they always reappeared. You didn’t want them, though. You wanted him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a new mercenary in town.

You were nineteen.

You’d gone to a warehouse and picked up on some clues that eventually led you to where you were now, stalking the Red Hood in the shadows.

He was a new mercenary that had just come into town, and you wanted to figure out why. You’d been tracking him for quite some time, and what Bruce had warned you was true. He’d only been here for two weeks but he knew his way around, and he definitely moved fast.

Suddenly, he disappeared. No warning, no trace of where he’d been. Your hand tightened on your knife, and you stilled, listening for the tell tale signs of unwanted visitors.

“It’s rude to stare, Ghostie.” The voice was directly behind you, and you hadn’t even heard him approach. Your body went rigid as you felt the barrel of a gun against your head, and his arm snake around your waist, pulling you close. You bit your tongue as a sharp burning pain started in your wrist, but he wasn’t anywhere near it. Odd, but you ignored it.

“Who are you, and what are you doing in Gotham?” you asked. He chuckled, which you didn’t think meant anything good.

“If I told you, then I’d have to kill you, right?” He rasped. You narrowed your eyes. You could easily get out of his hold, but by the way Bruce spoke of him and how he was able to sneak up on you so easily, you’d be willing to bet that he was aware of that and had about ten different ways to stop you. You decided against it for now.

“Good choice, Ghostie. I wouldn’t want to end playtime before it’s even begun,” he whispered, reading your mind. Something about his voice seemed familiar, like you’d heard it before. _Irrelevant_ , you told yourself. _Focus on the job._ “Why are you following me?”

“I don’t answer to you.” The gun pressed further into your head, and your wrist was just burning hotter and hotter.

“You do if you want to live,” he growled. You ground your teeth together and thought of what to say. You were there to get information from him, not the other way around.

“C’mon, don’t be like that.” He chuckled again, then suddenly looked away in the other direction and grimaced. While he was looking you got a good look at the gun in his hand, contemplating whether you could knock it away.

There were voices approaching nearby. Suddenly, he activated something in his hand that released a string of wire and wrapped around you, limiting your movement.

“Sorry sweetheart, but looks like I have to cut our meeting short. Until next time.” He winked, then was gone. You broke out of your binds easily, and stared after him.

He was so _familiar_ , but you just couldn’t place it.

—

“You said he disappeared, then showed up behind you?” Bruce sipped his tea and looked at you from under his sunglasses. You were sitting outside a tiny, rundown coffee shop that not many people knew about. It was the perfect place to actually enjoy the morning breeze without the paparazzi.

“Yeah,” you nodded, and shifted so that your were sitting on top of your leg in your chair. Normally, you wouldn’t have gone to him for advice at all, but you were desperate. “I didn’t even sense him creep up on me.” He stared blankly at his cup, and you watched him for a moment before speaking again.

“Did he seem.. did you get the feeling that you’ve met him before? When you fought?” He looked up and carefully scrutinized your features with narrowed eyes before answering.

“Yes,” he said slowly, like he was measuring the words he was about to say next. “He knew everything I was going to do before I did it, and he fought like one of us.” You raised your eyebrows. There was no one who fought like your family. Or exactly like them, anyways. You stood up.

“I’ll keep an eye out for him tonight. Watch your back, Bruce.” He nodded, his face betraying no emotion, but if you listened to his voice you could hear it.

“You too.”

— 

Ghost crouched on top of the stone gargoyle, scanning the streets for him. He watched her from a window, making sure to stay out of her line of sight.

She intrigued him. Nothing else had interested him this much since he died, and he didn’t even know why. Most of the population of Gotham didn’t think she existed, hence her name. She was fast, and definitely trained by the bat. But she didn’t associate herself with him like the others. She stayed out of sight, and took out the bad guys without revealing herself.

Which made it hard to tell at first, but Ghost was definitely a woman. He knew y/n had quit the job, or as was the rumor on the street, so it couldn’t be her. Babs was Oracle now, so not her either. He didn’t know anyone else she could be, but then again Bruce had picked up lots of kids in the four years he’d been gone.

What really made him interested in her though, was what’d happened the last time they met. As soon as he’d touched her, his wrist was white hot. It didn’t happen often, but sometimes soulmates were given a physical indication of each other. It was worth checking out.

He swung from the window to the rooftop below, which was slightly above the gargoyle she was crouching on.

“Miss me?” He asked. He knew he’d taken her by surprise when she went completely still.

“What. Do. You. Want.” She didn’t turn her head, just stared at the skyline. He crossed his arms. In truth, he’d come to figure out who she was, but he couldn’t tell her that.

“Just came to get acquainted,” he said, speaking as though he was referring to something as simple as the weather. He subtly turned on the device that would analyze the sound waves of her voice and help him narrow down the possible identities.“You going to tell me why you were stalking me?”

Slowly, she stood, turning to face him, one hand holding the bo staff, and the other on her hip. The black cape she was wearing hung over her shoulders, and the hood cast a shadow over her face. Unlike all of the other bats, she wore white to accent the black; the x on her chest, the gauntlets, and the inside of her cape was as well. He guessed it was the ghost thing. Her expression was blank behind the domino mask.

“I don’t appreciate unknown masks venturing into _my_ city, and killing people.” The lenses kept him from seeing her eyes, but he knew they were stone cold.

“I thought this was the bat’s city?” He questioned, with a tilt of his head. He noticed her jaw clench before she spoke again.

“We are acquaintances. You, on the other hand, are an unknown identity who threatened to kill me on our last meeting.” He scoffed.

“So I was just supposed to let you follow me in the shadows as long as you liked?” Her eyes narrowed. She was starting to get irritated, so it may be easier to get her to talk.

“Stay out of my city and you won’t have that problem, Hood.” She turned around and reached for her grapple. “If I see you again, you can expect a fight.” She jumped and was gone.

When he got back to his safe house, he plugged the device into the computer and waited for it to download. When the results came up, his jaw dropped a bit in surprise. The words read “possible identities: none”. Even if the program didn’t have every voice in the book, it would still list a few that were similar.

He clicked play on the recording instead, and the sound of static was brought to his ears.

“Sneaky kitten,” he muttered. There’s no way you wouldn’t be seeing each other again, and he’d sure as hell be prepared this time.

 


	3. Chapter 3

“Sorry, Babs, can’t,” you said, voice muffled because your mouth was currently stuffed with pizza. “I’ve got patrol.” She groaned, no doubt rolling her eyes.

“Y/n, you need to get out! You’re either cooped up in your apartment doing God-only-knows-what, working at the cafe, or stalking people on the streets like a mini-Bruce.” You scoffed, taking another bite.

“Bruce and I are _nothing_ alike. And if I want to stay in my apartment and binge watch Netflix, then who’s going to stop me?” You didn’t need friends anyways. You had all you needed when there were 12 seasons of Supernatural on Netflix and a perfectly cheesy pizza sitting right in front of you.

“ _I_ am. You’re coming with me Saturday, and we are going to have a fun night on the town, you hear me?” You choked, quickly swallowing your pizza so you could protest, but she cut you off. “No buts! Y/n L/n, you are going to go out and have a good time. Who knows, maybe you’ll even meet a guy?” You groaned, ignoring the tiny twinge in your stomach.

“Fine.” You huffed, hanging up on her and throwing  your phone to the side, flipping on the tv. The local news report popped up, something about a break-in at the museum. Nothing stolen, but multiple windows were broken as well as a couple of statues.

_“Authorities report that the suspected thieves were thwarted by Red Hood, the newest mask to grace Gotham City. No civilians appear to be hurt,”_ the news anchor droned on. You perked up, setting a slice of pizza down and reaching for your fizzy drink. _“Citizens are still urged to be alert on the streets, as he is armed and dangerous. Two bodies have been found in the past month with evidence pointing towards the vigilante, as well as the remains of eight others.”_ The screen then changed to the weather, and you flipped the channel, raising a brow. She hadn’t mentioned that the people he’d gone after were a mob boss that had been controlling a good part of lower east Gotham, and a serial killer that Bruce had been after for weeks. Half of the town celebrated when it happened. As for the eight, they were drug dealers whose heads had been found in a duffel bag in an abandoned warehouse.You didn’t know what to think of it.

Closing your eyes and rubbing your temples, you thought about your previous encounters with the man. You hadn’t kept your promise to fight, but you were otherwise preoccupied each time, so you thought that that had let you off the hook.

_The sound of gunfire rang through the air as you sprinted through the streets. There was a robbery on 5th and Main, and the suspects were holding hostages._

_Coming up on the side of the building, you kicked in a window and crawled through. Carefully, you stole through the basement and up the steps, until you were hiding behind a cracked door. You could see the masked gunmen waving around their weapons like lunatics, their fingers on the trigger. One of them was yelling at the poor bank tellers, while the others made sure nobody tried anything. You were going to move in, when the sound of shattering glass broke your train of thought._

_Someone had burst through the skylight. You looked through the wreckage, eyes falling upon none other than the Red Hood. Great. But he did create a distraction for you to burst in and take out the thugs aiming at the hostages. You quickly made sure all of the civilians were safe outside the building, keeping an eye out for more gunmen. Then you rushed back in._

_All of the men were tied up and subdued, with no sign of Hood. You had sighed, reluctantly slipping out the back._

_Two days later, you were perched on the edge of an old building, eyes locked on two men bolting out of a jewelry store. They each held a bulging bag, presumably full of diamonds and the like. They didn’t look particularly dangerous, but you knew better. This was Gotham, and everyone knew of the dangers that hid in the shadows._

_Your eyes flicked away as you spotted a woman and her child, about to turn a corner and walk smack dab into the burglars. You groaned internally, silently wishing that people weren’t so foolish._

_Soundlessly, you leapt from the roof to the alleyway below, taking in the scene. You’d been planning on incapacitating them from above, but that wasn’t an option anymore._

_The civilians turned the corner, coming upon the men. The woman gasped, taking a step back and tugging her child so that he was hidden behind her. The men noticed the movement, and now each held a handgun, aiming at the family._

_Before you had a chance to react, there was a crash and their guns were gone, Hood having knocked them unconscious. He glanced at the civilians, who were frozen in shock, then turned his gaze to you, still hidden in the alley. He stared at you for a few seconds before bolting, leaving you to deal with scared civilians and unconscious thieves._

_You had sighed, stepping into the street to take care of it._

You had come across him several times in the past few weeks. He was annoying, always screwing up your plans and making you fix his mess. The Gotham News had gotten more pictures of you in the past four weeks than they had in the past four _years._ Now nobody could deny that you were in fact real, and that was not the way you liked it. It was driving you insane.

As you turned off the tv and threw away the empty pizza box, you mulled everything over. It didn’t make any sense. Every week, a news article came out about Red Hood, the newest and most interesting of Gotham City’s crazies. He killed people. He was bad. Yet you’d seen him save people, and he even spared the bad guys. You’d never once seen him _actually_ take someone out.

You yawned, climbing into bed. Maybe he wasn’t all that bad, but you could figure it out tomorrow.

* * *

 

Swinging from the top of one building to another, you crouched, reaching your target. You’d finally decided to confront him after mulling it over for a couple of days.

He was leaning against the roof access, helmet off, one hand holding a cigarette to his lips. His mop of black hair was slightly curly and had a silvery-white streak across the front. He wore black cargo pants and an armored shirt, along with a brown leather jacket that had the sleeves scrunched up. You could see tiny white scars along his forearms, each no doubt holding a different story. What struck you as the most interesting, though, was the bat symbol plastered across his chest. It made everyone think he was one of them. But he wasn’t.

“Ahem.” You tensed, and then blushed. You hadn’t actually gotten a chance to take a good look at him until now, and you’d been gawking. “You just going to stare, ghostie?” You stepped out into the light, arms crossed and shoulders set.

“You really do take after him, y’know, with the whole ‘I am vengeance, I am the night’ routine.” He smirked, tossing the cigarette onto the ground and smothering it with his foot. You grimaced.

“I am not the Batman. If you want to get acquainted with him, then I’m sure you could find him somewhere out on the streets.” You stood still, watching him run a hand through his tousled hair and lean back against the wall.

“Cut the crap. Why are you here? We aren’t friends, remember.” You scoffed, walking over until you were a few feet in front of him. The moonlight hit his face differently from this angle, accentuating all of the sharp edges and curves that defined it.

You blinked, realizing he was waiting for you to reply. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Who the hell _do_ you think you are?” He raised his brows at that, then let out a chuckle.

“Haven’t you heard?” He drawled, playing with you. You growled, taking a step closer.

“No, why don’t you tell me? Tell why you’re on the news one day for putting eight heads in a duffel bag, and stopping a gunman from shooting up a bank the next.” You took a step with each heated remark, getting closer. “Tell me why you plastered that symbol on your chest when the last thing you wanna do is be associated with the bat. Tell me why you keep waving that gun around and threatening to shoot anything that breathes when I haven’t seen you kill anyone once. Tell me why I should be so damn scared of the big, bad, _Red Hood_ , when I haven’t seen him fulfill any of his big, bad, threats,” you finished, jabbing a finger into the middle of his chest. His jaw tightened, a vein in his neck pulsing. Suddenly, your chest was being pushed against the brick wall, one arm bent behind your back and the other held in place above your head.

“I’ll tell you why,” he rasped, his breath hot and heavy on your ear. You clenched your jaw, face heating up at the closeness. “I’m not like you, or Batman, I’m a bad guy. And bad guys do bad things.” His grip on your wrists tightened and you hissed as a white hot pain flashed through them. He must’ve hit some sort of pressure point, even though there were none that you knew of.

“Liar,” you breathed, bringing your foot up in between his legs and nailing his groin. He fell back in surprise and pain, grunting. It gave you enough time to swing him to the ground and straddle his torso, holding his wrists at his sides. “What do you really want?” He scowled at you, balling his hands into fists.

“That’s my business, ghostie.” You arched a brow, releasing his wrists and crossing your arms.

“My city, my business.” When he grinned, a tiny dimple appeared in his left cheek. Of course, you didn't have long to look before you were being flipped, him now straddling you. He held your hands above your head again, and you struggled for a couple of seconds before going limp. There was no way you were getting out of this one, for you didn’t see yourself getting free from his _rock hard thighs_.

“Now, we both know that isn’t true. This is Batman’s city, and you’re just following his orders like the rest of them,” he taunted, a smug smirk on his face. You snarled, fighting against the grip once again.

“I don’t follow anyone’s orders but my own.”

  
“That’s what you’d like to think.” He winked, and then he was off of you and gone in seconds, only pausing to grab his helmet. You huffed, getting up and peering around the city from above. There were no signs of him, only the orange-pink tint of the skyline. You ground your teeth together. You didn’t know why it bothered you so much, but you _would_ find out who that man was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I think I actually really love this chapter, so if you could do me a favor and let me know if you like it then that would be lovely!


	4. Chapter 4

“When was the last time you stepped out of your apartment to do something that didn’t entail waiting tables or running around behind a kevlar mask?” Babs sifted through your closet impatiently, fruitlessly searching for something for you to wear tonight. You were sprawled out on the bed, trying to decide if you could get away with faking sick. It seemed to be too late for that, though. “Here we go…”

She pulled out a deep red, lace dress. It was the one you had worn for your graduation party, and it was stunning. The sleeves only went halfway down your arms, and there was a low v neckline. The skirt of the dress went to your knees and fanned out, almost like a ball gown. You both stared in awe, adoring the dress. But.. “You want me to wear that to the _club_ ,” you questioned incredulously. She shot you an exasperated look, arching her brow.

“Who said we were going to the club?” You sat up, leaning forward on your elbows.

“I mean, I had assumed that’s what you meant. Where else would we go?” She stared at you in disbelief for a second, then breathed out a sigh.

“Y/n, it’s really been awhile since you’ve been out, hasn’t it?” You leaned back and crossed your arms defensively, scoffing. But it was true. You had isolated yourself so much in high school because of patrol and.. other things, that you hadn’t made more than a couple of friends each year, and that was just to keep up with homework because of when you had to miss for a mission. Babs raised her eyebrows, prompting you to speak.

“Maybe.” Another exasperated sigh.

“It’s alright, y/n. This isn’t about torturing you, or making you uncomfortable. I just want you to have some fun _outside_ of your apartment, and I wasn’t planning on achieving that goal by dragging you to some night club that I know you have no interest in going to,” she explained. You relaxed, shooting her a grateful smile. All Babs wanted to do was get you back into the social world, and you couldn’t blame her. “Besides, I don’t think nightclubs are wheelchair accessible.” You snorted.

“So, where are we going?” She laid the dress out on your desk, and wheeled over to where you had set some shoes out on top of the bed.

“I don’t think you’re quite ready for hardcore partying just yet,” she teased with a smile, and you launched a pillow at her. She easily deflected it and went back to examining the shoes. “But I was thinking about going to dinner over at that nice place on the corner of Fifth and Main, and then heading to the theater. What do you think?” You shot up at her words, excitement sizzling in your veins.

“The theater!” You beamed, hugging another pillow to your chest. Every time you walked- or swung- past it, you had to stop for a second to admire it’s beauty. The building had been built in 1903, with pillars and statues and gargoyles adorning the front. The inside was just as glamorous, glittering chandeliers and priceless paintings decorating the halls. Bruce had taken you there a couple of times when you were eleven. It was how you had first bonded, after losing your own parents and Dick running away to Bludhaven. Babs smiled, relieved that you were excited to get out of the house and do something that didn’t involve beating the crap out of someone. “Thanks, Babs,” you muttered, voice muffled by the pillow that you were currently squashing your face into.

She chuckled, a rich, happy sound. “My pleasure, kiddo.” You rolled your eyes at the nickname, groaning. “Now try these on.” She held up the shoes, along with an elegant silver necklace, and pointed to the dress. You swung your legs over the side of the bed and hopped to your feet, clothes in hand.

—

The evening was wonderful. You went out to eat at the place Babs had mentioned. The food was amazing, and the service was phenomenal. Then you headed out to the theater. It was just as beautiful as you remembered, if not more. The musical that they threw on was a classic, and they did it perfectly. You were beaming at the end of it, clapping so hard your hands hurt.

“Thanks so much for taking me, Babs,” you sighed, smile stuck in place as she rolled up in front of your apartment. “It was amazing.” She smiled and nodded, leaning over to hug you goodbye.

“Everyone just needs a little pick-me-up sometimes, right? Call me if you need anything, ok?”

“Alright. See you later!” You called as you slipped inside your apartment. Moonlight filtered through the windows, creating a landscape of shadows. You flicked on a light and headed straight for the bedroom, kicking off your heels and throwing your bag to the side.

After taking a quick shower, you found yourself lying in a mountain of pillows and blankets. You grumbled, rolling over to set your alarm. You had to be up at the crack of dawn if you wanted to have time to look over everything you had on Red Hood, _and_ make it to work on time. You had been planning on tracking him ever since the incident on the roof, but there hadn’t been any trace of him since.

You took a deep breath and let out a sigh, pushing him to the back of your mind. What you needed was a good night's sleep to get you through the week, and overthinking it wasn’t gonna get you anywhere. You closed your eyes, letting the cool air wash over your face, slowly lulling you to unconsciousness.  

—

“That’ll be $5.49, sir,” you said, yet again plastering the same fake smile on your face. It was about 7 in the morning, right around when everyone came in for breakfast and their daily dose of caffeine. You vaguely heard the door jingle again, signifying a new arrival.

“Hello, how may I help you?” You droned, an automatic response.

“Can I just have a cup of cold brew?” A deep voice asked, drawing your attention away from the counter and back to reality. You froze, taking in the _giant_ man that stood before you. He had to be at least six feet tall, face hidden by a pair of sunglasses and a baseball hat. He was about your age, and you could tell that he was ripped, even through the bulky sweatshirt he wore. “Miss?” You started, blinking yourself back to attention. He raised an eyebrow at you.

“I’m sorry, um, anything else with that?” You waved at the baked goods, and he momentarily shifted his attention to the counter below, shaking his head. Something tugged at you, and you couldn’t help but blurt out your next words as you handed him his receipt. “Hey, uh, have we ever met before?” He looked up, surprised at the sudden question.

“I don’t think so,” he mumbled, barely audible over the quiet music and low voices from other tables.

“Sorry,” you whispered, blushing slightly. “You just seem familiar.” Of course you hadn’t, it was just some weird impulse feeling that had come over you. He began to walk off, taking a seat by the counter to wait. You turned around, cursing yourself for attempting to talk to someone out of range of your scripted conversation. And then you cursed yourself again at the realization that you had completely forgotten to ask for a name for the order. “Sir!” He looked up, probably wondering why this girl kept incessantly bothering him. “Can I have your name?” He just stared at you for a second, slightly confused. “For your order,” you elaborated, face deepening even more in shade. He thought for a second, and you began tapping your fingers against the counter nervously.

“Jay,” he finally rasped, and you nodded, turning away to write it down on a cup. _Boy,_ you thought. It was only 7:30 and you’d already completely embarrassed yourself in front of the hottest dude that’d walked into the coffee shop in weeks. It was no wonder you didn’t have any friends. At least he wasn’t one of the regulars, you’d probably never have to see him again.

—

The cold night air bit at your lungs, muscles straining with every leap you took. After nearly two weeks, the Red Hood finally showed up to deal with a hostage situation at the docks. You were determined to tail him before he bolted, as you had had no luck in the past couple of weeks.

There was nothing you could find on him. You’d tried everything, but without knowing what he wanted, you had no possible backstories, and therefore no leads. It was almost like the man had appeared out of nowhere, on some sort of personal mission that was indecipherable to anybody else.

You sighed, landing on the docks and peered out at the streets, covered by the shadows in a nearby alleyway.

“I thought we went over this,” someone growled behind you. You whipped around, blade in hand and positioned at his throat. “Stalking isn’t very nice.” You lightly pressed the blade into the skin between his helmet and collar, barely making a dent.

“I thought you didn’t wanna see me.” The helmet prevented you from seeing his face, and that was infuriating to no end.

“I thought you may wanna help,” he snapped, jerking his head in the direction behind you. There was a small fire, but it was spreading towards a couple of overturned cans of gasoline. It would not be small for long. You grumbled, removing the knife from his throat.  Immediately, he sprinted towards the building. You followed, calling the Gotham City Fire Department and yelling at people to get away.

“Where are they?” You yelled at Hood, trying to be heard over the commotion. You should’ve looked into the situation more before you came, but when you’d heard Red Hood was at it again you’d rushed in blind.

“Three on the second story, four on the roof,” he shouted back.

“Hostiles?”

“Don’t know how many.” You growled, reaching for your grapple.

“I’ve got the roof.” The hook caught the edge of the building, and you ran to get a decent velocity so that you could make it to the top. Your boots made a thud as you landed, crouching behind the access door. A woman, who seemed to be the leader of the group, gave orders into a walkie talkie while two men pointed guns at the hostages, who were grouped together back-to-back. One man, two women and a boy. The poor boy was shaking, and had tears trailing down his face. It sickened you when criminals decided it was a good idea to bring kids into their sick games.

The leader turned in your direction, looking out at the wreckage below, and spoke into a cell phone. “There’s a fire spreading. We’re leaving in the next five minutes; the question is whether or not your friends are coming with us,” she rasped, taunting whomever was on the other end. The hostages must’ve been people close to them, not just civilians they’d picked up off the street. “If you don’t agree to deliver the supplies to my warehouse on the outskirts of the city, they’ll get a front row seat of what’s to come.” She hung up and threw the piece of metal over the side of the building, turning back to watch her men. It puzzled you that she’d want supplies instead of money. Most people didn’t have any problems getting guns or drugs, they just needed the cash. What the hell could be so bad that she’d have to go directly to the source for ransom?

Before she could make a move back, you leapt out from behind the roof access and swept her legs out from under her, smashing her head to the ground and bringing her unconscious and to the floor. The others immediately began shouting and shooting at you, making you dive for cover again. Footsteps creeped towards you, and you charged forward, hitting one of them hard in the solar plexus, then kneeing him in the groin.

“Stop!” The other man yelled, bringing your focus back. He had his arm wrapped around the little boy’s chest, a gun held to his head. Everything seemed to freeze around you, even the breath in your lungs. “Stop or I’ll shoot!” Slowly, you backed away, putting your arms in the air as a sign of peace.

“Just let the boy go,” you said, trying your best to balance between authoritative and comforting. “All I need you to do is let him go and you can leave.” He shook his head, slowly shuffling towards the door.

“No, see, you listen to me. I’ll take ‘im and drop ‘im off somewhere along my way out of town. If I see you on my tail, he dies.” The night air felt claustrophobic, like it was gonna strangle you if you kept breathing it in.

_Crash._

Something not too far off drew both your attentions away from the situation at hand and to the noise. The man relaxed his grip, lowering the gun for a split second. Taking out a knife, you made a move to disarm him but the barrel was immediately pressed into the kid’s stomach. Tears were running down his face, whimpers escaping his mouth from terror.

_“What did I say?”_ The man was yelling at you now, trying to reach the exit quickly. The other hostages were still on the ground, watching with round eyes and pale faces. One of them was sobbing. The fire had already blown up, and it had already caught the building. There were less than three minutes until it came down, and there was no way the gunman could get out alive through the bottom.

“Wait, you can’t-“

“I told you what I’m going to do,” he snarled. You shook your head, taking a slow step closer. He tensed up, and you held your hands up again, dropping the knife.

“That way’s not safe,” you reasoned, gesturing towards the door. “The fire is surrounding the building, and the lower half has already caught. You won’t be able to get out in time.” He narrowed his eyes, considering your warning, before taking a measured step away from the door. You took a small step closer. “It’s going to be much harder to get off this roof with extra baggage-“

“Stay back!” He was still adamant about keeping you away, the gun an ever looming threat to the poor child. Panic ebbed away at you.

“Just let me take the boy-“

“ _No.”_

_“_ Sir-“

_Bang._

You stumbled back in shock, surveying the sight before your eyes. _No, no, no_. You fell to your knees in front of the boy, taking him in your arms and cradling him, rocking him back and forth. “Shh, shh, baby,” you whispered, dread filling your veins. The little boy curled into a ball, sobbing into your chest. “Let me see, kid, you gotta let me see.”

It broke your heart to meet the child’s swollen, bloodshot eyes, filled with fear. You laid him down on the ground, tearing off a piece of his shirt to stop the bleeding. “Where does it hurt?” Your hands traced his body, searching, finding nothing.

“He’s alright.” You jumped, not even realizing that Hood had come to join you. Then it dawned on you, when you laid eyes on the crumpled form of the remaining hostile. Relief bled through your body, and the little boy was okay and whole. “We have to get out of here, c’mon everybody.” Scooping up the child, you swung him over your shoulder, having him hold on piggyback style.

“You can hold on to me, ma’am,” you offered, gesturing to one of the people on the floor. With two out of four civilians in tow, you used your grapple to swing to the next building, and the next, until you were a safe enough distance away. Hood followed suit, dropping off the remaining people to safety.

After making sure everyone was alright, you swung down to the alley below, watching Hood’s back as he made his way out. “Hey,” you blurted out, before you could think better of it. He turned around with a tilt of the head, prompting you on. “Thank you.” You aren’t quite sure where the words came from, but they were definitely owed. “That boy would be dead without you.” He turned back around, shaking his head as he walked away.

“I’m sure you would’ve thought of something.” It was a lie, and you both knew it. Something that someone said to ease their conscience at night.

  
Except, it shouldn’t have been him saying it, it should’ve been you. _Why was he so damn determined to be the bad guy?_


End file.
